pop goes my heart

I swore i'd never fall in love again but then pop goes my heart.

Sitting alone, all the others at home, i'm just trying to sort myself out, just trying to figure this life out.
Lying awake, but my heart it don't break cause im tired of letting myself down, im sick of the choices that brought you around.
you were a mistake, one i had to make, so i could be stronger, so i could belong here.
when i hit rock bottom The only way is up, can't go down so i turn around it's time to try my luck. I will never give up my right, my right to be wrong, it's what keeps me going strong.


For so long i saught you out, wishing you'd come about, hoping for your love and dreaming of your touch. thinking it's all ok, that was just yesterday, we could be ok, it wouldn't take too much. but if i didn't mean it then i wouldn't say it. Why am i writing this song. Pushed away and my records play it's all i have when you walk away, Holding on to a love gone wrong just trying to get through another day... what am i tryna say? If i am over it somehow not thinking of you now then why... am i writing this song, if that was just yesterday and now it's all ok then why, am i writing this song. Pushed away and my records play it's all i have when you walk away, holding on to a love gone wrong just tryna get through another day, Someone else's bliss can't live like this there's a life out there i know i'll miss... if im stuck like this. This time i let it go, wanted you to know, i was stronger and i had a whole new show. I say that i am fine and remember when you were mine, i say that im over it, that was another time. But if im so, sure of, my feelings, this time, then why... am i writing this song. If im so over, over it so past it gone from it then why, am i writing this song. if im so stronger, brighter then that girl who went to plan then why, am i writing this song. pushed away and my records play it's all i have when you walk away. holding on to a love gone wrong just tryna get through another day, someone else's bliss cant live like this there's a life out there i know ill miss... if im stuck like this... If im so over over it so past it gone from it then why... can i not let go... If im so over over it so past it gone from it then why... am i writing this song, if im so stronger brighter then that girl who went to plan then why... am i writing this song, why... can i not let go, can i not let go... Lying here i dream of you i wander if you're dreaming too i know there's nothing i can do but i... i still love you.



Those are two songs i wrote once that have been buzzing around my head annoying me, so i thought i'd write them out. I can remember, for the second one at least the long days spent at the piano as i plunked it out and found it's melody. it's calming for me, to write a song... i'm not very good but i like it. Sittin there, putting my words and feelings to a melody that i find on the piano is one of the most magical things i do. i can remember fooling around on the guitar and piano trying to find the melody to suit this piece... i can remember every time i got annoyed, or tired or laughed or finally found the right note. it seems an age away now... and an age away i almost performed it, although that was in fact only last week. feelings, old memories... w/e Even though the lyrics don't stand true for me now... whenever i start to play the beginning chords to it on the piano every memory of those feelings comes flooding back... it's my gateway to part of my past. this is what music means to me, this is what my life is.